The Married Life with the Devil in Disguise

Once married, we returned to the home where I had been living with my parents to inform them that we had just taken our vows to love, cherish, honor and obey. I later learned while living with this man a whole new meaning to all of these precious vows. My Father promptly advised my new husband and I that he would be helping me pack my things; that is which things he felt were vital at this time and not all my possessions as he felt I did not deserve them until later on when he decided it would be so. He then packed my clothing and a few personal belongings and my precious Manx cat, told me good bye, asked for the keys to my 1965 Mustang; mind you this was my first car and that really stung, but I vowed material items were not important, the man I just married was to be my first and foremost priority. My mother did not utter one single word, only cold, callous, bitter were stares, which alone spoke thousands of thoughts carried the rest of my life. So off we were with the promise of a song in my heart to a new life in the small town of Redding, California, a cabin we were renting for a whopping $85.00 dollars a month with the plumbing actually out back of the kitchen, yes folks I kid you not. My first vicious experience with this husband was when he made Spaghetti and meatballs for our dinner, I was to do all the cooking, cleaning, wifely duties, however he felt inclined one evening to fix our supper, little did I know of the malice intended. I will never forget sitting down in the kitchen at the tiny table to enjoy our meal thinking, why is there pen and paper next to my plate? I soon found out the answer to this question when I was served my plate and told before I began that I should write out my letter of how my husband had poisoned my food and that I was an awful, selfish, worth no good of a person, hence my untimely death. I had to have turned as pale as a ghost, as this is when the verbal humiliation began. "What's the matter?, he said." " Do you not believe that there is truly poison in your spaghetti?" I honestly was speechless as I was so naive to think that a person who had stated to love me would possess the ability to derive such an evil plan. I pulled myself together and said, " Do you really mean to sit here and tell me there is poison in this food? Who the hell do you think you are?" Early on in this miserable wreck of a marriage I would fight, scratch and try to claw my way out of this nightmare, only later on to find out, no such luck would have it, I was to fail miserably. He once again told me to pick up the pen and put to paper exactly what he had told me to write; I then again argued my point, at which time I was then thrown backwards out of my chair against the kitchen cabinets and slapped in the face until I was placed back in my chair and told, again, write the words that I have spoken, least I remind you again that I am your husband and you will do as I say. I determined my will and again stubbornly stood my ground, screaming that he must be insane if I was going to write the letter much less eat the meal when it came time; once again I flew out of my chair into the cabinets and this time was slapped until I pleaded for him to stop and I would obey him with his request. He placed me at the table one more time and then informed me that maybe I should take a bite, which in his thinking would convince me of the poisoning. I thought I would vomit right then, my nerves were shattered and my soul was turning into gray matter with the thought of eating food that would take my life. He again challenged me with a look that only one who has seen evil close up and personal would recognize; I stared blankly into his eyes, thinking, what choice do I have. I prayed silently to Father the Almighty to save me from all my sins, and prepared myself to die, then reached for my fork. At this time my husband broke out in the most deep hideous laugh rolling over and over saying; "You stupid bitch, did you really think there was poison in your food?" "I have such plans for you that I would never do this yet, however if you ever test me again, you will not know when or where it may come from but you will die at my hand."

Onward through my looking glass

I will not mention names as it would only prove to serve more harm than purpose when it comes to my spouse, I honestly would never want to run into him again, as long as I live, suffice it to say, he is an evil, evil man with no good intentions. As I continue, we were married on my eighteenth birthday, we had been engaged with a wedding date all set, however about three months prior to my eighteenth birthday I found out I was pregnant with what would have been my first child. We told my parents, which at first seemed to accept this current situation, allowing us a single wide mobile home in the mobile home park that they owned and ran in our small town, while my future husband planned a career and caring for what might have been his first child. Then, one evening my parents must have come to some great conclusion that this would just not suit their professional and personal lifestyle as they swooped me off in the night to a town a couple hours out of where we lived, dropped me off at the Hospital with specific instructions to abort the pregnancy; with me being underage, this was all too acceptable, once checked in, they made an escape to a Hotel where as not to been seen by a person from our hometown, and left myself to be attended by unknown nurses and a doctor who would perform the procedure. I remember the midnight nurse coming in to take my vitals and wondering why I was there all alone, I too wondered these things, only to wake in the morning after the procedure; be whisked off by my parents, heading home to our small town, to call my then fiance' and let him know the most recent events. Needless to say he was more than disappointed, with him being a devote Catholic, remembering my parents words and promises only sent him into a tailspin that would allude us as being a couple until I turned eighteen, which is when we promptly arrived at the Justice of the Peace, carrying our marriage license which was still valid, to vow love until death do us part; little did I know my marriage would prove to be death while living...

The Early Years

I will begin my story at the age of eighteen as I feel that is when my life truly began for the first time. My parents were very proper and raised me with Iron Clad fists; not allowing me to date until I was seventeen, however trying to marry myself off when I was sixteen to a forty-three year old man, luckily with the stubborn Irish soul I had, I was able to fight them tooth and nail and win!
I met my first husband while still a senior in High School, later to find that he was the devil in disguise, he was very dashing, charming and full of himself, but I was smitten, wanting only to free myself of my parents and saw him as a way out with the hopes we would have the white picket fence with two cats in the yard life, only to find out I had swallowed a whole lot of 'Alice In Wonderland" pills and would soon find life not to be so...